I’m not new to blogging. In fact, I have done this a few times before. What I am new to is “hiding” my blog from people that I know. If i’m going to be honest, I need it just to be me and a bunch of random people.
Doesn’t it appear in life that the grass is always greener on the other side? That’s how I feel lately. I’m a 34 year old single woman who wants to have a family in the worst way. Not just a family, I want all of the stuff that comes with it. I don’t want to do this alone. I want a man who will love me for who I am and put up with my flaws. I want to experience the joy and pain of child birth. I want to have a house. People with whom I talk to say to me “Jenny, you are lucky you aren’t married”. I don’t feel lucky. I feel stuck. I’m sufficating.
I no longer like my job. I have been at the same job for over 2 years, but doing the same line of work for 10. I realized with the Christmas break we get, that this is not what I want to do. So change it, you say? Easier said than done. What do I do? How do I afford to live?
I know it seems like a lot of whining, and i’m really sure people aren’t even reading this, but this is where i’m going to go. It’s nice to be able to spill it out without drama surrounding me or people talking about it.
So what do you think world?
happy new year….
am i allowed to comment? or should i just read? i will be happy to do either…
you sound adrift and i too, know that feeling. I don’t even know if you are aware I was married before. I married someone I dated for 6 years… and was married and miserable. I thouight I had married my best friend, but I wasn’t being true to myself therefore he didn’t get the real amy…… we couldn’t grow together because of that… and some of his issues and we didn’t make it….
i was a single girl in my 30s watching the world go by and sad about the fact I may never have that one person I dreamed of…. maybe even a family to love and cherish….
finally my friends made me realize i wasn’t going to come home from work and find my dream man sitting on my couch…. they said i had to go find him =) …. so i did match.com. it worked ! I went on dates with about 9 diff guys…(some guys more than once)… and when I was fed up with it (it seemed like the guys kept scanning there profiles… looking for more,better)… I answered one last email… and voila… it was him.
It took me a long time, I went thru some serious hell and some major soul searching…. but I got there in the end.
be true to yourself… if youre not happy at work, change it… i don’t know how but start checking it out… do you want to go back to school? but this i know… only you, YOU, can bring the goodness forth into your life…. and you have so much goodness….
I hope 2009 puts you on the path to what youre looking for in your life….. you’re a good egg my friend…
xoxox
Thank you for the kind words. If you weren’t allowed to comment, you wouldn’t
be a part of my blog and I wouldn’t have told you the address. you can swap
out this one for the other. I’m meeting up with an old friend fron high school
today. I’m looking forward to it. He (yes, he lol) was my best friend back
in the day. I always wondered about that…so we shall see!
well that makes me happy
getting out and doing, no matter the outcome is good…
let us kn ow how it goes
going to switch addy’s…..
where’d you go?